My Mornings When You Left
I had a dream.
A man lied beside me.
He whispered, "Forget him, I'm here."
He whispered, "Forget him, I'm here."
But when I opened my eyes, I only saw your face.
I broke down.
I called out your name again and again begging you to come back.
I broke down.
I called out your name again and again begging you to come back.
I woke up with a stabbing pain in my chest.
I was running out of breath again.
I got up, stared blankly out the window, and felt hot tears running down my cheeks.
I got up, stared blankly out the window, and felt hot tears running down my cheeks.
It was dawn.
It was still and quiet.
I felt the cool breeze on my skin and longed for your warm embrace all the more.
I started wondering where you were at that moment.
Were you still soundly sleeping? Or like me, were you also up early and felt the same loneliness?
It was still and quiet.
I felt the cool breeze on my skin and longed for your warm embrace all the more.
The empty hole in my heart since you left seems to be growing wider and wider by the minute.
Were you still soundly sleeping? Or like me, were you also up early and felt the same loneliness?
Another day started.
Another ruthless, insensitive day.
Everyone will soon start rushing about and getting on with their lives.
And I will be here, trying to live and make sense of the world without you. Trying to put up a brave face for the world to see. Trying to fake a smile despite the pain. Trying to act as normally as I can in a world so familiar yet so strange without you in it.
All I can do is keep myself occupied so I can stop thinking about you, and that horrible nightmare; do normal things like normal people do, but dreading sleep.
Most of all, dreading another morning without you.
Another ruthless, insensitive day.
Everyone will soon start rushing about and getting on with their lives.
And I will be here, trying to live and make sense of the world without you. Trying to put up a brave face for the world to see. Trying to fake a smile despite the pain. Trying to act as normally as I can in a world so familiar yet so strange without you in it.
I feel so vulnerable without you beside me. Like a child lost in a huge crowd in a strange place.
Most of all, dreading another morning without you.
4 comments
would you like to find that person from your dream, might be a good question. watcha think?
ReplyDeletei am more curious than you are :)
ReplyDeleteyou didn't answer the question. would you? and what if leaving "ahem" is the only way to find him?
ReplyDeleteSo poignant! You must be proudly smiling now while reading this post back.
ReplyDelete